


And Then I Came Here

by RamsettParkSwings



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:01:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24634237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RamsettParkSwings/pseuds/RamsettParkSwings
Summary: Leslie and Ben one-shots, covering everything from early season 3 through season 6. There will be some angsty post-breakup chapters, but mostly very happy.
Relationships: Leslie Knope/Ben Wyatt
Comments: 25
Kudos: 46





	1. Chapter 1

After the Kiss

“Chris isn’t here. He took off.”

“Oh, okay,” Leslie handed Ben the receipts, and then she was practically floating. Her lips melted into his quickly, grateful for his decisive move. They parted briefly, but Leslie reconnected them without delay.

“Uh oh,” she said breathlessly after a few seconds.

“I know... that we can get in trouble, Leslie.” He took her hand in his. “But I don’t know if I can listen to Chris anymore. I mean, can you?”

“No,” she shook her head. “It’s just-it’s _such_ a silly rule. But I don’t think any rule could have kept me from your adorable yet surprisingly powerful mouth for much longer.”

He chuckled (and reddened) at her response. “What do you say we go out tonight?”

“Or… we could stop at JJ’s, pick up some waffles, and eat them back at my place,” she suggested.

“Yeah,” he nodded, taken aback in the best way possible. “That sounds great, actually.”

“So tell me, how many tall brunettes did you date on the road?” Leslie set two cups of orange juice down on the coffee table, taking her seat next to Ben on the couch. She placed her leg on his thigh, and noted the flutters that went off in her stomach when he gently gripped her leg with both hands.

“Ugh-okay, I dated _two_ tall brunettes in Valparaiso and Indianapolis and now Chris thinks they’re my type.”

“Well what is your type then?”

“Passionate, selfless, devoted civil servants who have shockingly extensive knowledge of Eleanor Roosevelt and Pawnee history.”

“Me, you’re talking about me,” she smiled, leaning in to kiss him.

They must have kissed 30 times already, but damn it if she didn’t feel shockwaves through her body every time. She felt as though she really could melt into him if they kissed for long enough.

“Speaking of Eleanor Roosevelt, I have an idea for what we could watch-”

Ben’s phone cut her off. 

“Sorry, it’s April.”

“April? Oh that’s right, you guys live together.”

“Hello? No I’m… staying with a friend tonight,” he glanced nervously at Leslie. “You’re using my blankets to WHAT- April! Great, she hung up.”

_Damn it._ Leslie felt the intense weight of reality crash down in front of her.

“What is it, babe?”

“We’re going to have to hide this from everyone. We’re gonna have to sneak around and pretend that we don’t like each other and Ben, I am, in your words, ‘not that sneaky.’”

“Leslie-”

“And I already told Ann-”

“Already? Wow that was-”

“And what if she lets it slip? Oh what am I saying? Ann’s beautiful, cunning, resilient brain would never let that happen. But still! And then we have-”

“Leslie. Leslie. Slow down.”

“How are you not more nervous? I mean, you just got this job.”

“I’m nervous too, honey, but let’s not think too much about it just yet. I guess I’ve waited so long for this that I don’t really have room in me right now to worry about that.”

She exhaled loudly. Ben couldn’t tell if it was meant to be a sigh or a breath she had been holding, but at least she seemed to slow down at his words.

“Okay,” she nodded. “Your adorable mouth is persuasive. Not tonight.”

He was right. There was no denying things could get messy, but not tonight. Tonight, she just wanted to lean into Ben’s side and take in the warmth, security, and affection that just seemed to radiate off of him then and there. After all, there was no denying that she loved taking risks. And this, she thought as she leaned into Ben, was by far the sweetest, dorkiest,  _ coziest  _ risk she’d ever taken. 


	2. I Found My Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night of Ben and Leslie's wedding is one of the many times they realize how lucky they were to have found each other. Especially considering their dating histories...

  
The drive home felt surreal. Leslie realized that, somehow, she had never appreciated just how beautiful the streetlights on the way home from work were. Tonight though, in the passenger seat of her and Ben’s car, as she toyed with the newspapers that doubled as her wedding dress, there was something deeply comforting yet stirring about their warm glow.

  
“So, what does my amazing wife want to do for the rest of the night?”

  
“I think I just want to cuddle, for 10 hours at least, then sleep, then wake up next to my husband, whose compact little body is just wearing the hell out of that suit.”

  
Ben smiled at her, only for a second, yet today more than ever, she felt the intensity of his stare.

  
“Everything just feels so much better tonight, babe. I want to keep it going.”

  
“We can certainly do that. We don’t have to go to sleep right away.” The ride home was quiet in the way Ben had become used to with her. He knew what she meant. Everything really did just feel better. He’d driven on these same roads more times than he could count, but they seemed to expand endlessly in front of him tonight. Against his will, he remembered those awful months when they were broken up. He remembered the tight feeling in his chest that he felt in those times whenever he was reminded of her. Before tonight, he never would have guessed that there was a feeling that was the exact opposite of that miserable, breathless feeling.

Tonight, he felt his chest expand with the road in front of him. He could almost swear that he felt the warmth of the streetlights as they lit his way home.

Leslie threw her head back in laughter as Ben listened to her in confused horror.

“What?! Okay. Let me get this straight. You broke your knee cap,” he nodded.

“Yup.”

“And the guy couldn’t even wait until after you went to the hospital? He sounds like a major douche.”

  
“He was!” Leslie giggled. She’d slipped off her wedding dress and changed into her pajamas, but she still felt the incredible post-wedding rush. “He wasn’t even the meanest one. The meanest one was the one who broke up with me over skywriting.”

  
“Skywriting?! Oh god, Les, that’s awful,” he said, giving her a horrified look. She looked as beautiful to him as ever in her gray t-shirt, with her blonde hair now loosely framing her face and her fingers fiddling with the neckline of his shirt.

  
The microwave beeped, interrupting whatever she was going to say. “Our popcorn’s ready,” she said while jumping up from the couch.

  
Ben watched her walk to the microwave as the events from the night hit him for the 300th time. She was his wife. He meant his vows: even if he hadn’t realized it, he really had been looking for her all this time. And now, as he watched Leslie walking back with the popcorn and a beautiful smile, he could hardly believe he had waited so long.

  
“My breakups have been raging dumpster fires, but don’t even get me started on my first dates. Didn’t I tell you about the time I drank an entire bottle of vinegar? Or when my sleeve caught on fire?” she asked while taking her seat next to him.

  
“Um, no, Leslie, you have not told me about the time you drank an entire bottle of vinegar or the time your sleeve caught on fire. I like to think I’d remember that,” he deadpanned, before giving into a confused laugh.

  
“Well, long story short, there was no second date for either of those guys. They were mutual decisions,” she nodded unconvincingly, “I don’t think my being on fire or vomiting influenced that too much.”

  
Ben shot her a skeptical glance. _Curse him and his adorable mouth and his genius brain that saw right through her._

  
“Okay okay, now you tell me about your bad relationships.”

  
Ben paused to remember. They seemed so irrelevant to him now.

  
“Well I’ve never had an awful relationship, but there was this one time I dated a girl in Valparaiso and her parents filled my car with bags of ice. Turns out her dad’s brother lived in Partridge when I was mayor and they recognized my name and face immediately. That’s dumb luck for you. I mean, what are the odds?”

  
Seeing Leslie’s concerned look, he added “They did find me on Facebook later and apologized, so that was nice.”

  
“What did they say?”

  
He shot her a stoney glance. “We’re sorry we were so frosty.”

  
They paused for a beat. Then Leslie cracked a smile, and it was over. 

  
“They really said-what did you-” she couldn’t even get a sentence out through her shrieks of laughter.

  
“I didn’t respond! I mean what could I say?!” he laughed. 

  
Leslie wiped the tears from her eyes as new ones sprung in their place. That apology really did crack her up, but she felt the rush of wedding euphoria finally bubble out of her stomach like those gross gas station waffles that one time. Actually yuck, she thought, scratch that, bad metaphor. 

  
Still, she looked at her husband (husband!) and wished she could go back to those failed dates and bad breakups and promise herself that it really would work out. It had been hard to keep up hope, even for someone as optimistic as her. Having a guy invite you over for a picnic just to break up with you and wait for some girl named Rebecca can do a number on the old self esteem.

  
“Well it comforts me to know that someone as amazing as you has also had bad dating experiences,” she said as the laughter died down.

  
He looked deeply into her clear blue eyes that he’d grown to love so much. He could almost feel them inviting him to sit next to her for as long as they both wanted.

  
“I’m grateful for all of them, though,” he said, taking her hand, “because it led me here, to you. I don’t even wanna know where I’d be if I’d stayed with Frosty girl.”

  
“Huh, well now I kinda feel bad for her. Her parents made her miss out on the most amazing genius elf king on Earth.”

  
“Oh we actually dated a little after that.” She gave him a puzzled look. “We broke up because she would not stop talking about her ex and how he owned his own sportswear company or something. I reminded her of him. Guess I have one of ‘those’ faces.”

  
“I mean to be fair, you’re a 5’9 skinny brown-haired white guy. Not exactly distinguishing characteristics there, pal.”

  
“Harsh, but fair,” he said in mock-hurt. 

  
“Now, if she’d said her ex had a butt so perfect it may as well have been delivered to humanity as a gift from Prometheus himself, I wouldn’t even believe her ex wasn’t actually you.”

  
“Right, what with my thriving sportswear empire, it’s an easy mistake to make. And-wait- did you just compare my butt to Prometheus’ gift of fire?” He said, narrowing his eyes.

  
She giggled and nodded. “I did.” 

  
“Because...they both heat you up?”

  
As they found themselves falling into yet another fit of laughter, Leslie couldn’t help but note how comforting it was when their laughs blended together as they sat there, delaying the time when they would have to go to bed and end this perfect night. 

  
Of course, exhaustion eventually got the best of them, and it was all they could do to stumble back to their room to prepare for their honeymoon tomorrow.

They were both inches away from sleep, but Ben’s mind couldn’t bring itself to end the day. Even in the darkness of their bedroom at 3 AM, he was more aware than ever of Leslie’s presence in his arms. He pulled her closer to him, her face buried in his neck, and nuzzled his face into her hair. He recalled Chris’ words to him before the wedding. One of his life long joys would always be that he had found Leslie, and that he had finally found a home.


	3. Nights Like This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night of the recall is tense and miserable, but it's nothing they won't get through.

Ben had only seen Leslie fall silent- really, truly silent- a handful of times before. He was prepared: he knew that these rare occasions called for back rubs, head kisses, and quiet, gentle affirmations in his wife’s ear.

Of course, he couldn’t do any of those things as he drove them home from City Hall.

“I am so sorry, honey,” he whispered. Not that he thought it would help. His own heart hurt for her, of course, but he could almost feel the ache emanating from her in the confines of their car. 

He couldn’t believe the irresponsibility, the ignorance, screw it- the utter  _ stupidity _ of the people of Pawnee sometimes. He knew that they were easily swayed by punchy news headlines and a certain evil candy company, but to get rid of the best person they had in local government? At least when Partridge impeached him, he had deserved it. This, though, was uncharted territory.

He’d hardly noticed that he had pulled into their driveway. Leslie almost hadn’t either. The vacant look on her face sent pangs to his chest. Leslie, the human embodiment of energy and positivity, looked as if her very essence had been drained out of her.

“We’re home, babe, let’s get you into bed,” he said in a raspier voice than he expected. She let out at a small, almost inaudible sigh as she unbuckled her seatbelt and rushed out of the car without looking at him.  _ Okay, think, Wyatt, what does she need? _

She was tired, but she was not slow. By the time Ben closed the front door behind him, she had disappeared into their bedroom. She was pulling on her pajama pants by the time he reached her.

“Hey,” he said quietly.

A sigh.

“Hi.”

“Leslie, honey, this is awful, and I am so sorry that the people of this town can’t see how amazing you are.”

“Maybe I’m not that amazing Ben, maybe I’m just oblivious. Maybe I should’ve added more sugar to their sodas, or a Paunch Burger on every street corner,” she said bitterly. “I can’t sleep, why don’t we just watch TV or something.”

“Okay, if that’s what you want, babe,” he said, giving her a weak smile.

  
  


Unsurprisingly, she didn’t seem focused. The murmur of the television was nothing for the silence that hung heavily in the air between the two of them. This really was worse than Ice Town in some ways, he thought. Ice Town was devastating, but he was a dumb 18 year old kid. 

Not a supremely qualified, intelligent, devoted public servant like Leslie. There was no one who deserved this less than she did, and nothing Ben could say could fix this. And that fact hung in the air like a thick cloud, choking them into a stunned silence.

They didn’t speak for the duration of the episode, which wasn’t actually all that strange. What was unusual was how far Leslie seated herself away from him on the couch. As if she couldn’t even face him or touch him in her defeat. Ben felt his stomach sink for what seemed like the hundredth time that night.

To her credit, she lasted a while. She made it all the way until they were sitting upright in their bed, about to turn off their lamps. But tension has a way of snapping at the worst times. Only a quiet sob escaped Leslie’s lips, but it broke whatever pretense of denial existed between them. Before Ben could lean closer, she buried her face in her hands. Her fingers gripped her hair, almost like she wanted to rip it out with her fingertips. She couldn’t understand it. She didn’t think she ever would. But here they were.

Ben rushed to wrap his arm around her as her cries broke through. “Let it out, honey,” he whispered. He didn’t tell her to stop crying or that it was okay. He gently moved her fingers out of her hair and replaced them with his own.

“How-how could they do this? I guess I- I never really  _ believed  _ they would. I trusted them to see how hard I was trying.”

“I’m so sorry for how awful some of the people in this town are,” he said. “I know this cuts deeply- believe me, I know- but this isn’t the end for you. You’re  _ incredible _ , Leslie.” He made small circles around her back with his hand. “I’m not just saying that because I love you. I mean it, sweetheart, you’re talented. You’ll do great things.”

“But what does it even matter, Ben? These jerks just proved that even if you do great things, people can still hate you and recall you. God, it’s over.”

He hated seeing her like this. Nobody was more positive, more of an optimist than she was. Seeing her defeated reminded him of his cynical days as an auditor, when he would’ve said that someone like Leslie had no place in a serious government. He knew that to be false (she had proven this to him more times than he could count), but it pained him to see the public’s response to the someone they clearly didn’t deserve.

“I know you loved being on City Council, and I-”

“It’s not just the City Council. It’s everything. Where can I even go from here? What, should I take a job as an auditor and see if I can find a better town, like you did?”

He didn’t know whether to laugh or be offended. His face must’ve chosen the latter because Leslie immediately apologized. 

“I’m sorry babe, I didn’t mean it like that,” she sniffed, and he softened. “I just meant- I love Pawnee. And I worked so hard to get to where I am. I don’t know if I can start again, you know?”

“Well, babe, if you get good enough at your job, and you climb high enough, someday you’re gonna have to.”

She sighed. He was right. Of course he was. There was only so much room to grow in Pawnee. But she always assumed that her movement away from office in her beloved hometown would be voluntary. And that it would be  _ up _ , not down. She said all of this to Ben. 

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “Progress isn’t always linear. You might have some bumps but the overall trend will be up. I promise.”

“I was right in my speech in London, you know. This town is full of pee-pee heads.”

“Come on, Leslie, this is a bit more serious than that,” he said gently.

“Yeah, I know Ben, it’s just-”

“This town is full of _ poo-poo  _ heads,” he corrected.

She laughed shakily as he gripped her hand. He gave her one of his adoring smiles, looking at her with such affection and care that actually she felt some tension leave her body. For a moment, Leslie remembered how much she hated his adorable mouth when they first met. They’d come so far, personally and professionally. But here she was going backwards.

By now, her breathing had calmed. It was still shaky, but she could take deep breaths now. “In my head, I know you’re right. But tonight, it’s just not gonna feel better. This is horrible.”

“I know,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “But I’ll be here. Whether we’re celebrating. Or whether we’re having nights like this. I don’t know what’s gonna happen. But I’ll hold you.”

She sank into their bed, urging him to follow, which he did of course. She thought she was out of tears, but the next hour proved her very wrong. At first, she thought it was strange how the warmth of pressing her head against Ben’s chest invited her to cry more, not less. But then she understood. Here was someone who could see her most painful failure and not only sympathize, but really, truly understand. And somehow, still believe in her with everything he had. Even when he was seeing her like this.

Nothing was okay right now. But somewhere in the cycles of crying and soothing and cuddling, she started to have the very faint idea that maybe soon, it would be. She buried herself more deeply in Ben’s chest. This would be enough for now.


	4. An Awkward Conversation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leslie goes just a little too far with her comments on Ben's body, and he needs to say something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is based off of a deleted scene from "Are You Better Off?". Leslie talks about his calves and he says "honestly sometimes I feel like I'm being harassed" in a genuinely distressed way, which Leslie then brushes off and ignores, and it's played for laughs. I always thought that Ben was just good-naturedly, roll-your-eyes-then-smile annoyed about Leslie's comments, but that scene a) proved he's genuinely upset by them sometimes and b) dismissed it, so I had to write something about it.

“Capri pants? So you can see my calves?” Ben hoped his voice conveyed enough genuine annoyance to get his point across.

“I see your calves all the time! It’s so other people can see your calves and get jealous,” Leslie said suggestively.

“Honestly, sometimes I feel like I’m being harassed.” He was exasperated now.

“I know. Put them on and walk around in front of me,” Leslie tried to hand him the capri pants she had bought him for their ‘zeroth’ anniversary.

“No, Leslie, look,” he started. So he was having this conversation _now._ Okay.

“I love how attracted to me you clearly are, but sometimes, you take it a little too far and it… makes me uncomfortable,” he gave her a pained look.

“Oh- okay.” She took a small step back from him. “Reall- okay,” she nodded.

For just a moment, they were both silent. She seemed like she was going to say something-

“Leslie! Councilman Howser wanted your signature on something.” Chris’ voice came from outside her office.

“He’s in City Hall on a Saturday? Just a second Chris!” She looked at Ben, who was now fiddling with the zipper on his hoodie.

“Ben, I’m-” her voice was soft and heavy with remorse.

“Go talk to Howser,” he reassured. “We have the river cleanup and then we can finish talking about this.”

She gave him one last regretful look before stepping out of her office. Ben watched her walk away, leaving him standing there in front of her desk, not quite sure what to do with himself. He hated how his heart was beating just a little faster, his mouth just a bit drier than when he said something. This was Leslie. He could and should tell her anything without being nervous. And this wasn’t a big deal anyway, he told himself.

  
  


The Saturday morning river clean-up followed without incident. Or conversation, really. The two of them usually worked as a pair, racing each other to see who could pick up the greatest number of rusty cans or plastic bags, egging each other on with good natured trash-talk. Literally _trash_ talk, in Leslie’s case, since she loved puns. But without exactly meaning to, they distanced themselves from one another.

Ben found himself sticking closer to April this time around. This proved to be a mistake; He’d forgotten how perceptive April could be when she wasn’t hating the world. When he and Leslie were broken up and he was living with Andy and April, she had come pretty close to figuring out that he was suffering through a heartbreak. 

“Why aren’t you bothering Leslie? Did she finally find out about your affair with your actual lover, Chris?” she asked in her typical deadpan.

“He’s actually not- Leslie and I just had a bit of an awkward conversation earlier today, though I’m not sure if that’s something I should-” He paused. April had left. Of course. He focused on the task at hand. He liked to fixate on specific items one at a time. Now, he was channeling all his effort into dredging up trash bags. He was so focused on his mission he didn’t even notice he had bumped into Leslie. 

“Oh. Hey, honey,” he said. He wasn’t sure what it would be like between them. _Please be normal, Leslie,_ he pleaded internally.

“Hi,” she said just a little too loudly. “How’s the cleanup going? How’s it hanging? How’s the experience? Hopefully nothing too trashy,” she joked.

He chuckled uneasily. Uh oh. Leslie was terrible at hiding her feelings.

“It’s good, just- uh- going with flow,” he responded. When Leslie didn’t say anything, he continued, “Like- like a river. Like with the river’s flow-”

“Oh, good one!”

“Okay this might actually be worse than you two not talking. What’s going on?” April demanded. 

_Where the hell did she come from?_ Ben asked himself. “It’s nothing, we’re just joking around, trash talking like we usually do,” he tried to say smoothly. 

“I agree with April, the atmosphere between you two _lit-erally_ could not get any more awkward,” Chris jumped in. 

“Forget it, guys, Leslie and I are just in a bit of a fight, it’s nothing,” Ben responded.

“We are?”

“Oh no,” Chris said before Ben could reply. “There is _nothing._ On this Earth. More obstructive to joy than marital discord. I am going to jog up and down the river bank to stimulate endorphin production while you two work this out.” True to his word, he took off down the river bank. 

“Okay you guys never fight, so I’m sure whatever it is is stupid and you need to forget about it already or else I’m gonna pour all the garbage we collected into your bed. While you’re in it.” April said.

Ben glanced at her. “You know April, you should just go home early so that Leslie and I could-”

April dropped the giant trash bag in her hand and raced away from them. 

“...talk this out,” he finished. He turned to Leslie. “Hey.”

“Hey.” For a moment, they said nothing. 

“I’m really sorry honey. If you don’t want me to make comments about your body anymore, I won’t do it.” She gave him such a remorseful look that _he_ almost wanted to apologize to her.

No. He had to stay firm. He only wanted to have this conversation once. “Well, babe, we are _married_ so that’s not what I want. I don’t mind the occasional _non-detailed_ casual remarks, just, can you stop them there, and not take them so far?”

She gave him a small smile. “I take it the capris were a bit much?”

“Just a bit. I mean, they’re nice and I am keeping them, but yeah,” he smiled.

“And no saying anything about your taut, sexy calves?”

“Well I can think of one activity of ours where I wouldn’t mind hearing you say stuff like that, but yes,” he said, laughing now. “There’s a time and a place.”

“Okay. Okay. You’re right. I shouldn’t have played off your discomfort like that. I’m sorry.”

He felt a weight leave his shoulders. He really shouldn’t have worried so much. This was Leslie. No conversation was too awkward to have. In fact, he thought to himself, the uncomfortable conversations are probably the ones they should prioritize. He gave her an adoring smile.

“Apology accepted,” he said, leaning down to kiss her.

“Way to go team! Way to go!” Chris shouted as he raced past them on the river bank.

They laughed, both at Chris and in relief. The rest of the morning passed without occasion. As was usual after they had an argument, they were extra loving and giggly around each other. Ben loved that about them. Even after apologies were exchanged and issues were resolved, they felt the need to be extra expressive about their affection for one another.

“Bet you I can collect more rusty cans!” Leslie piped up.

“You’re so on.” As he watched her race to the nearest can, he couldn’t help but beam at her enthusiasm. For cans, her job, everything. Uncomfortable or otherwise, this was the woman he wanted to have millions of conversations with for the rest of his life.


	5. Hometown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The drive back from Partridge

Leslie would be lying if she said she didn’t feel the tiniest bit guilty. She was the one who had convinced Ben to make the drive to Minnesota and accept the key to Partridge. They’d made a whole road trip out of it: stopping everywhere from tiny tourist traps to Minneapolis and Chicago. It was a fun trip, sure, but not one they were likely to have made if they had known the whole thing would be a ruse. Though in her defense, she didn’t realize the people of Partridge were such jerk faces.

The drive back home through the endless Minnesota plains was calming, in a way, but also tense and...awkward? She thought they’d talked it all out after the fake ceremony, but the 13 hour drive that lay ahead seemed to make the utter uselessness of their trip the elephant in the room.

Leslie tried to break the silence with some lighthearted banter. She asked him for fun stories about his childhood, to which he responded that his childhood was boring.

“Really? Nothing else of significance? Come on, there has to be something.”

“I think I’ve told you everything noteworthy at this point. Like I said, I had a pretty uneventful childhood!”

“Okay, it doesn’t have to be noteworthy. I’ll start. When I was 16, I went to a party, but I accidentally spilled punch all over the host and he made me do a whole load of his laundry.”

“What? Don’t tell me you actually did it,” he laughed. When she didn’t respond he gave her an exasperated “Leslie!” and they both chuckled.

“I felt bad! And I got all the stains out. Your turn.”

“Okay, when I was 15 I had a crush on my math teacher, and it turned out that she was having a relationship with a senior. That kinda disillusioned my trust of adult authority figures I guess.”

“That sentiment probably got you elected,” she said without thinking.  _ Crap on spatula,  _ she chided herself. She glanced over at Ben, staring straight ahead as he drove. He didn’t seem angry, just... sad.

“I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “I shouldn’t have-”

“It’s fine Les,” he assured her. “It’s been 20 years. Just because they can’t move on doesn’t mean I shouldn’t, right?” He posed it like a question for her, but he was half convincing himself. 

“Right. You’ve done so much, so what if you messed up a town at 18?” She cursed herself under breath.  _ God what is wrong with me today?  _ She wondered. “That’s not what I meant. So what if the unemployment rate skyrocketed?”  _ Nope,  _ she mumbled.

“Well don’t sugarcoat it,” he joked. “But seriously, I shouldn’t depend on their forgiveness. I’m sorry we came all this way.”

“What? I’m the one who pushed you to do it.”

“Yeah, but I’m sorry you had to give that speech and get wrapped up in that...mess.”

“I’m happy to defend you from those jerks, babe. And at least now I really  _ know _ why you had to get out of there.”

He smiled contentedly at her. He couldn’t exactly say he regretted the trip. It hadn’t gone according to plan, and it  _ certainly  _ hadn’t given him the closure he wanted so badly, but at least Leslie got to meet Steph and see where he grew up.

“Okay, back to stories, I’m into this now. Let’s skip childhood stories. We had a solid decade and a half of adulthood before we met.” 

“Ooh this one time, a guy asked me out on a date, but then I found out it was only to make his girlfriend jealous,” she said.

“Aw, I’m sorry babe.”

“I think the worst part was that his girlfriend was there.”

He gave her a horrified look. “Didn’t we cover all your first date horror stories? That’s what we spent our wedding night talking about.” He seriously couldn’t believe that wasn’t everything. On the other hand, he loved his wife, and so he hated himself for even thinking this, but he  _ kinda  _ understood why her dating life had been so unsuccessful. Leslie was, to put it simply, incredible, but she could be a bit much. Either way, he was lucky those other men hadn’t appreciated her, or else he never would’ve been able to date her.

“Buddy, that was just the tip of the iceberg,” she said, snapping him out of his thoughts. “Your turn. There must be something I don’t know from your 12 years traveling.”

“Well, it was pretty boring. Mostly no one cared about anything. I guess one noteworthy thing was the town I went to where everyone still used AltaVista. Oh, and there’s a constant threat of raccoon attacks, and they put the weirdest murals in their city hall-”

She smiled, catching on. “It sounds like a great town, if you ask me.”

“It is. Makes being disowned by Partridge not as bad as it used to be.”

“It’s okay if it still is, though.”

He shot her a puzzled look.

“You know, getting disowned by Partridge. It’s okay if that sucks, you know.”

“Yeah, but if they hadn’t done that, I would’ve never come to Pawnee, and I never would’ve met you,” he said with sincerity.

“Plus, I’m glad you got to meet Steph,” he added.

“Me too, she told me a lot about you,” she said suggestively. “Nothing bad!” she laughed when she saw his eyes widen in fear.

“Oh thank God,” he exhaled. 

“So. Third base with Cindy Eckert, huh?” 

  
  



	6. Not a Chapter

I'd love to start taking prompts for one shots so I'll give my tumblr: tjsmittencyruskippen

Also leave prompts in the comments if you want!!


	7. How to Ruin a First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Speed Dating AU: Leslie has a speed date with a cute, if callous, state auditor who recently got an accounting job in Pawnee.

She really didn’t mean to be aggressive. She had ruined a few too many first dates to not have picked up on what to avoid, and critiquing someone’s occupation was definitely in the Top 5, at least. But when the admittedly cute, if a little shy, state auditor from Indianapolis started talking about gutting budgets with machetes, she had no choice.

“So you just...slash and burn? Sign a few forms and get a bunch of people fired and cut their programs and..”

“Well, Leslie,” he said pointedly, “I like to think of it more like tough love. I’ve saved those towns from the long term consequences of their own mismanagement.”

“Why are you even dating, if you move around so much?”

“I don’t know, I guess it’s been so long since I’ve been able to put down roots anywhere, I wanted something more stable. So I took a job at this accounting firm, and here I am.”

A glimmer of hope. He had left his job.

“Where are you from?” she asked.

“A small town called Partridge, Minnesota.”

The name struck a chord she couldn’t recognize. She gave him a puzzled look, then-

“You’re Benji Wyatt?” She asked, incredulous.

“I am.”

“You were so cute! And, god, I was so jealous of you!”

“Well it pretty much ruined my life. I sank all the town’s money into a winter sports complex called Ice Town and we went bankrupt. I got impeached and I can barely go back to even visit for the holidays. Trust me, they did not think I was cute after that.”

She saw that he had interpreted “cute” like a puppy, and not cute like “I cut out your picture from the newspaper and put it on my bedroom corkboard.” But that was just as well. He was callous and unfeeling and she had no room for someone like that. Right? Even if his mouth was adorable and the old flutters in her stomach she’d get from looking at the corkboard were coming back. Even if she knew she had to honor seventeen-year-old Leslie’s impulses. Her mouth worked faster than her mouth:

“Ice Town sounds incredible. Definitely not out of the realm of something I would have tried at that age.”

He quirks one side of his mouth.  
“Honestly, Ice Town is the whole reason I got into the auditing game. I wanna show people I’m responsible so I can run for office again someday and not be laughed at. I mean, you wanna run for office don’t you?”

“It’s not my place,” she started, “but maybe you should get another job. Someone with the drive and passion to run for mayor at 18 can’t end up hacking away at budgets all the time. Think about a job in government.”

He started to say something but seemed to decide against it.

“Think about it. Help us build something.”

________

He quit the accounting job ten days later. He didn’t love the carpeting, and the commute wasn’t great. Oh well, he could handle disappointing Ted and Barney. It’s not like he’d ever do it again, he joked to himself. It wasn’t to try to get into the local government scene. It wasn’t to speed up the process of running for office someday. And it  
wasn’t because of a certain blonde deputy director who hadn’t left his mind since their speed date.

But maybe he would stop by City Hall. And maybe he’d drop by the Parks Department. He was a native Minnesotan, after all. He found nature beautiful. And if he just happened to get a proper introduction of the fiery, strong-willed, and optimistic beauty native to Pawnee, that was just fine by him.


	8. It Just Makes Sense

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben and Leslie have their first big fight as a married couple, and Leslie fears her steamroll-tendencies might scare Ben away.

Ben Wyatt did not shout at his wife. He could be grumpy, sure. And sometimes, he raised his voice just a bit. Who didn’t? But he didn’t yell. Not when he was intelligent enough to know that that wasn’t the effective, mature response. Not when childhood memories of hiding in his closet to drown out his parents' ear-splitting arguments were seared into his brain. Not when he had subconsciously promised himself that he would never be like his parents before he was even old enough to spell “marriage”.

He was currently trying very, very hard to keep that promise. Because he loved Leslie more than anything, but, _god,_ sometimes she could be so stubborn and unintentionally inconsiderate that he almost understood why people felt like they needed to shout to be heard.

“Do you seriously not get it?” he snarled. “I paid $400 for that convention reservation. I’ve been looking forward to this for weeks and now it’s just...gone. You just decided it wasn’t as important as what you wanted and now that opportunity is just gone.”

“Because-”

“And it was non-refundable, so I just wasted $400 on nothing. Thanks a lot, babe,” he said. The sarcasm was bitter on his tongue, but felt appropriate.

“I canceled because I thought going to a statewide fair with your _wife_ would be more enjoyable than going to some convention with a bunch of strangers! Sorry for that horrible assumption.”

“God, Leslie, that isn’t the point!” He wasn’t _really_ yelling now, but he was definitely being harsher than he was used to. “See, that’s the problem. It all comes back to the same thing. You do what you want, you ignore what I want, and you only hear what you wanna hear!” He saw a strange look flash across her face, but he was going too fast to question it. “And maybe I don’t always want to be with you! You can be so _much_ , sometimes.”

There it was. They stared at each other as the air went cold between them, feeling as if the very walls of their house had exhaled at the release of grievances that had finally bubbled out.

“I know. I know I do that,” she breathed out after a moment. “I’m sorry, honey.”

Her apology made him feel more satisfied, and softened him, a little, but it disappointed him how little it soothed his rage: it helps no one if she just _knows._ He knows she knows. It’s a discussion they’ve had before, albeit less explosively. But they were still having the same problem, and her admission wouldn’t bring his convention ticket back, and, _damn it,_ he couldn’t believe he and Leslie were having their first big marital fight over Star Wars Convention tickets of all things. No. He was still seeing red.

“Leslie, honey, I love you very much, but I can’t stand to be here with you tonight.”

Those words gripped his stomach. Neither of them had ever said that before. At least, not after they got back together. But he was being mature, right? Stepping away when he was too angry to have a productive conversation? His parents certainly never knew how to do that. The only time they ever stepped back was when it was all broken, when there was nothing left but the shredded scraps of what was meant to be a lasting union, and walking away was the only thing they _could_ do. But Ben wasn’t Stephen or Julia Wyatt. He was Ben. He knew what to say to resolve his conflicts. And it had to mean something that, even on their worst nights, he still called her “honey”.

And yet, it was the wrong thing to say. She stepped back reflexively, tears pooling in her eyes. She looked like she had been slapped. He could almost feel the sheer hurt that had just washed over her. 

“You don’t want to be with me?” she asked quietly. He recognized why. Any louder and her voice would break.

“Leslie-” he started.

“It’s your choice. I won’t steamroll or make this difficult. But...are you coming back?” she searched his eyes desperately.

“What do you mean? Like am I coming back tonight or…”

_Wait._ He’d made it obvious he just wanted to cool off for the night? She didn’t actually think-

His tone shifted to something much softer now, almost matching hers. “Are you asking me if I’m leaving you?”

“You’re not, are you?”

“Oh God. No! Of course not. How could you even think that?” His stomach sank. So much for him being “mature” and having a “productive conversation.”

“It wouldn't be the first time I almost drove you away over this.” Tears were silently escaping the corners of her eyes. “It wouldn’t be the first time someone _did_ leave over this. Or the second time. Or the third time.”

He walked over to her and put his hands on her shoulders, before changing his mind and wrapping her in a bone-crushing hug.

“Honestly, I’m upset. But I think I’m more upset that you think I’d ever leave you. Our relationship is stronger than that. You have to know that.”

It shouldn’t have surprised him. Of course, his wife was confident and amazing and she knew her worth as a partner. But was it really so shocking that Leslie, who’d struggled for years with crappy breakups and jerks who barely noticed her, who had been told her whole life that she was just too much, still had a bit of a sore spot about people walking out on her? 

“You never think about it? When I’m being too...intense?”

He pulled back to look at her. “Leslie, that’s pretty much one of my favorite things about you. I mean, I could do without some of your more single-minded antics, like this for example, but I promise you, I know what I signed up for.”

“And it’s worth it?” He knew that deep down, she knew the answer to that question. She just needed to hear it.

“It’s more than worth it. I know you have a complicated history with breakups, and your intensity wasn’t always appreciated but...” He trailed off, gathering his thoughts. “Do you remember my vows?”

“Of course.”

“Your intensity wasn’t always appreciated, but it's exactly what I spent 11 years in 46 cities looking for. _You_ are what I spent 11 years looking for. It’s so worth it, Les. It’s more than I ever imagined I’d get. It’s so much better than anything I could have dreamed up before I came here.” 

It was true. He recalled his years on the road when he would occasionally let himself fantasize about marriage and his future wife. He had imagined comfort, stability, a sense of finality in knowing who he’d wake up beside for the rest of his life. He had imagined something like most of his past relationships. Something with a definitive size and place in his life. Something comfortable and warm like a bonfire: He could stand by it. See it. Feel it and enjoy it for the duration of its burn. And once it was out, he’d have to contend with a few remains, but the smoke curled into the sky only briefly before vanishing.

What he had never pictured was a fire from deep within his chest. Something that could jolt him out of a trance, move him faster than he imagined possible, and give him more warmth than he thought even Partridge, Minnesota had frozen out of him 20 years ago. Something that, if taken from him, would leave him to choke on the ashes for a long, long time. 

He had never pictured this before Pawnee. How could he? He hadn’t met Leslie Knope.

She gave him a watery smile, as if she could read his mind. Knowing Leslie, he wouldn’t be surprised.

“Sometimes, I really do wonder why you love me this much.”

“It just makes sense.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was from a twitter prompt, but it was also kinda influenced by "Still Into You" by Paramore. Idk when Hayley sang "And baby even on our worst nights, I'm into you", and "I don't really need to wonder at all" I just pictured this.


	9. Warmth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben is feeling nervous about being City Manager, and Leslie comforts him.

Ben looked comfortable; he was sitting in bed next to Leslie as he thumbed through his worn copy of  _ A Song of Ice and Fire _ . He glanced at her, filling out paperwork as she so often loved to do at home. It should have been comfortable. Yet Ben felt his agitation grow with each passing minute. He squirmed under the sheets. How could he be calm when he was in charge of a whole town again?

He had felt elated when he first heard the news, of course; it was a dream come true! As much as he enjoyed solving accounting puzzles, nothing quite compared to the satisfaction of being part of a government body. He didn’t say it often, because the sacrifice had absolutely been worth it, but he missed his days as Assistant City Manager.

His first and second days as City Manager were a little rocky (thanks April and Donna), but his excitement for the job had helped him push down his anxiety. The problem came as his first week came to an end. The reality of his position was truly sinking in, and it felt like the more time passed, the closer he was to an inevitable repeat of his past. In his darkest moments, he felt like the hands of a clock, fated to return to a certain position eventually, no matter how long and winding the journey in between may be.

His eyes scanned the same line over and over again. He felt just about ready to curl up into a ball when he felt Leslie’s soft hand through his hair.

“Babe,” she said quietly, “What’s wrong?”

“What do you mean? I’m just reading. Like I often do. Nothing to see here, everything’s a-okay.”

She quirked an eyebrow at him. He wasn’t sure whether he was truly a terrible liar, whether she just knew him too well, or, most likely, a combination of the two, but she could almost always catch him in a lie. Not that he lied to her often. It wasn’t worth it.

“Okay,” he exhaled. “I’m just worried. About being City Manager.”

“Oh, honey, that’s why you’re so anxious?” she asked gently. “Well that’s understandable. Starting a new job is stressful. The night before I started City Council, I snuck into City Hall and polished every seat in the council chambers.”

He appreciated her attempts to soothe him, but she could only help him if she knew the whole truth. It wasn’t actually that hard to be honest with her about being nervous, at this point, once Leslie drew him out of his initial hesitation, but Ice Town was unique in its ability to make him question everything. It made him feel shame even with her.

“It’s, um, it’s not just nerves,” he replied, fiddling with the string on his pajama pants. “It’s also...Ice Town.”

  
“Oh,” she said softly. “You’re worried that you’re gonna make a big mistake?” She started tracing soft circles against his back.

He nodded. “And I know it was a long time ago, but it’s not easy to forget. It took me so long to rebuild my life. I can’t do that again, Leslie. I-I don’t know how I’d survive.”

“Ben, you’re not gonna have to do that. You’re gonna be an  _ amazing  _ City Manager. You were 18 when Ice Town happened. You’ve learned so much, you have years of budgeting experience, you were even the Assistant City Manager for a while and you did a great job. And your first week has gone well, right?”

“Yeah, but what if I  _ do _ make a big mistake? Then what? The whole town would hate me. I’d have to start all over, probably leave Pawnee, and there goes everything I’ve worked for for the last two decades-”

“Honey-”

“And, oh god, what about you Leslie? I’d just drag you down with me. It isn’t fair to you. Maybe I should’ve just stayed at the accounting firm-”

“Honey, just-”

“This was a bad idea, I don’t know why I thought-”

“Sweetheart, can you take a deep breath for me?” She raised her hand back up to his hair and curled her fingers. She nudged the two of them slightly lower under the covers as Ben eagerly cuddled into her side. 

She continued making her small circles on his scalp, smiling as he positioned his arm over her waist and laid his head on her shoulder. She was more often the one who sought comfort like this, burrowing into his side, reveling in the feel of his fingers through her hair until whatever was bothering her seemed miles away. It wasn’t that Ben didn’t talk to Leslie about his problems. He had by now learned to open up almost on par with her, but  _ this  _ was still a relative rarity. For him to seek out her warmth with the fervor he was displaying now was still far from frequent, and it produced conflicting feelings in her: of course, it broke her heart just how much he was really hurting. And yet, there was something deeply intimate about it that she couldn’t ignore. He was never more vulnerable than he was in times like these.

“I’m sorry, Les, I know I’m qualified, and I shouldn’t panic, but I can’t help it.”

“It’s okay, babe. You’re allowed to be anxious,” she said, then planted a kiss on his forehead. “I know that sometimes you feel like you’ll never escape your past, and that you’re destined to repeat it, but I want you to know that that couldn’t be further from the truth. Ice Town does not get to define the rest of your life. You have learned so much. You are the most intelligent, persevering, and dependable man I know, and no one is more capable of this job than you.”

“Yeah?” He smiled up at her, almost shyly. He’d heard variations of this before, but it was priceless to hear now.

“Yes,” she said emphatically. “I’d trust you with anything. And I know Ice Town was brutal, but your goal shouldn’t be to outrun it and forget it. It’s part of you. It led to all of the great things you’ve done since. It led to you learning all the skills that are gonna make you a great City Manager. You can’t ‘outrun’ it, but, sweetheart, you don’t have to. You, Ben Wyatt, Ice Town and all, have done more than enough.  _ You  _ are more than enough.”

He didn’t respond, at first. He wanted to say something, but he knew he’d only choke on his own voice. Instead, he tightened his grip on her to show his appreciation, as if her words would sink into his mind if only he could hold them- and her- closely enough. 

_ And maybe they already are,  _ he thought. His body softened against her, the tension already leaving him.

“Thanks, honey,” he said after a moment. “You’re the best wife in the world. I love you.”

“I love you, too, babe. I’m so proud of you.” 

She ran her thumb over his cheek, unintentionally wiping away a stray tear, and Ben felt his stomach flutter. He resented the blush in his cheeks; he trusted Leslie more than anyone in the world, and it annoyed him that he was still a little shy about being comforted like this. But childhood patterns were a powerful thing, and though he had made great progress, he still had a little ways to go before he could be truly free of the effects of his WASPy, emotionally stifled youth. For now, though, he took a (slightly shaky) breath and let himself relax in her arms.

“Ben?”

“Hm?”

“If you did make a big mistake again, we would figure it out. I’m gonna be right by your side no matter what. I know you’re gonna do an amazing job, but even if something does go wrong and your career gets thrown off again, I’d be right there with you. And we would figure out the next steps, together.”

He reached up to kiss her. “That means a lot, Leslie. I’m lucky to have you with me.”

“Not as lucky as I am.”

They laid in comfortable silence for the rest of the night, limbs entwined for long after they finished talking. When he drifted into sleep, free of even traces of embarrassment and self-doubt, he stirred only to reach for Leslie. Her warmth enveloped him, putting the faintest hint of a smile on his lips, and sustaining him through the night.


End file.
